In this video, Sean Cooper gives some unique tips for how to stop caring what people think of you a.k.a. how to not give a fuck.
These tips include:
- Insight from the turning point in his social anxiety,
- How to view criticism to make it not feel bad,
- And a photo of Sean holding a baby sloth.
Click on the sloth above to play the video now!
After you finish watching, these notes can help you remember some of the key ideas:
Nobody can really totally “stop caring what people think.” Well, maybe a sociopath can. But most of us are engineered to desire people’s love and acceptance.
So the idea is to shift you more to having your own center… so that your self-concept (the way you feel about yourself) isn’t totally controlled by other people’s opinion. You’re more in control now.
- Make a plan to enjoy yourself even if nobody joins you.
- Mindfulness meditation helps you become “grounded in your immediate experience” instead of obsessing about your reputation in your mind.
- You are not your reputation. You are not what you imagine other people think of you.
- In fact, usually your imagined “reputation” is just a reflection of the way you see yourself! Only people who have low self esteem, a negative self image or insecurities spend a lot of time caring what people think.
- Pay attention to when you’re feeling defensive, it reveals there’s a bruise inside you that need defending.
- Criticism is about the other person, not you. Other people are trying to feel better about themselves and get their needs met just like you. Trying to understand WHY they said something will do more for your ability to take criticism than taking everything personally.
- You have limited fucks to give. If you don’t have important things in your life, like a passion, hobby or close relationships… then you will waste your fucks on random strangers and little things that don’t deserve it.
Wonderful video. Thankyou!
Thanks for the article, I´m gonna apply all your tips in my life to see the changes, I also believe in all you said and I´ve known it deep inside but I haven´t had the courage to make it. Thank you, your way of explaining is so easy to understand that now I have more confidence on trusting your words.
I wish you well.
This is brilliant and very insightful advice. So much of what you mentioned really struck a chord. Thinking too much about what other people think of me is a massive issue for me. I will be using this to help me move forward in my life. Very happy I have found this website. Thank you!
Hi, I really love you post. It is very real. Thanks for sharing your tips and I totally agree with what you’ve said. Great Read.
I’ve been reading/listening to a lot of your articles about social anxiety, etc. I’ve always hated myself for being shy and going blank around people and feeling worse about myself… I hope to take as many points of advice and become better socially.
And how cute, Aw you got to hold a baby sloth!