Self consciousness is that awkward icky feeling that other people are watching, judging and analyzing your every little movement or word.
I used to feel self conscious all the time in public–even just walking past somebody in a park or buying some food at the store! I always felt like other people were critically judging me.
In this video I show why one of the cures for self consciousness is actually…to become MORE self conscious! (Or more accurately self-focused: focused on what you are doing.)
See, most shy and socially anxious people are too easily distracted trying to pay attention to what every random person might be thinking of them. This makes you focus too much on other people when you are walking down the street, shopping or trying to talk to someone in a crowded place. As a result you feel awkward and you freeze up trying to talk to someone in public when other people might overhear the conversation.
The solution is to redirect your focus. Allow yourself to ignore all those background characters in your life.Focus more totally on whatever you are doing. (Just like in a movie only the main characters are in focus, the unimportant background characters are blurred out.)
To really understand this technique, which I call “Tunnel Vision” you need to watch the video above now.
And practice this in your daily life to feel less self conscious in public.
(NOTE: There is also a different type of self consciousness where you feel insecure about some part of your appearance, body or clothing. I did not talk about this type now — maybe I will in a different future update!)
what if other people do watch me constantly? .unfortunately,people don’t accept us as we are,they don’t help us to overcome our shyness.everyone has a foible,i believe that.but why people focus on other’s more than focusing on themselves problems?
i love myself as i am but the problem is people don’t love me as i am. don’t accept my difference. i am not well-spoken but i am a good listener.
manar, Alot of people do. They look at anybody randomly and they’re like “fuck that guy! look at his shitty walk, and his stupid shoes” and move on about their day. It has nothing to do with you, they won’t remember you [their opinions won’t accumulate], it ultimately doesn’t matter what they think of you, and it’s none of your business.
The way I was lured into watching the ad for the social anxiety guy’s program [which i didn’t know was an ad until 15 minutes into it], made me think, “what a jackass”, but the cognitive trick that this guy described? Focusing on what you’re doing?
Pretty good advice. Even though he really needs to get to the point. Too much stalling, too much relating, WAY too much sales pitch, and not enough point making. The advice though when you finally get to it? Gold. I have got to admit.
Props to Sean for that. That’s what matters in the end.